I’ve long since accepted that I belong to a family of pack rats who LOVE to accumulate stuff and find it extremely difficult to part with anything, from old T-shirts to frayed sheets or multiple dog-eared copies of the same book.
There are many days when I’m tempted to just pick up a large garbage bag and start chucking stuff into it. I fantasize about how much easier the house would be to clean and maintain in order if it contained 80% fewer things.
Unfortunately, trying something like this around here would start a full-blown war, so I’ve come up with a compromise that preserves my sanity while avoiding conflict: find one item, every day, that you can get rid of without regrets.
It can be anything: an empty perfume bottle, an ancient set of dried-out acrylic paints, a pair of shoes that pinch just a little (and that, if you’re honest with yourself, you know you’ll never wear). This strategy amounts to hundreds of unnecessary items a year, out of your house and of your life. And often, you’ll spot more than one thing you can toss.
On another note, today marks the release of my 20th fiction novel: Lethal Water, book 2 in the Storm of Elements steampunk-y fantasy series. A decade has passed since I self-published my first novel, after snatching away an hour here and there on the family’s clunky desktop while my kids were asleep. Here’s to many more exciting stories to come!
I just finished Bullshit Jobs: A Theory by David Graeber, a highly thought-provoking read. It discusses how “We have become a civilization based on work—not even “productive work” but work as an end and meaning in itself.”
In simple words, the author claims that a big chunk of jobs today is unnecessary, pointless, or at least extremely inefficient.
I’ll be the first to admit there’s a lot of truth in this. But you know what? That’s pretty privileged thinking. Many, perhaps most people I know wouldn’t mind working some silly job as long as it pays well, is fairly non-stressful, and leaves them a reasonable amount of free time.
I’ve worked on quite a few bullshit projects myself. One was writing copy for a major U.S. solar panel installer. This company decided it needed hyper-focused local SEO, with separate service pages not just for each state, but for every major town or city in each state. This translated to hundreds of pages that all followed the same template, except for a location-specific paragraph that usually included a couple of phrases on the city’s climate and topography.
Each page had to be different to avoid duplicate content on the top-level domain, so I had to reword what was essentially the same content in hundreds of variations. There are only so many times you can do this without feeling like you’re stuck in some Groundhog Day remake.
I highly doubt all that micro-localization was necessary. For most people, state-specific information is quite enough to decide whether installing a solar panel is a good idea.
And guess what? I was supremely grateful for that job. It was steady, predictable, fairly easy, and it paid decently. Those hours I spent writing about installing solar panels in Boulder, CO, or Flagstaff, AZ, translated into groceries for my family, paid utility bills, and clothes and shoes for the kids.
If someone offered me a well-paid, secure, flexible job that consisted of copying license plate numbers into Excel sheets or something like that, I’d take it in a heartbeat. For most people, a paid job is a means to an end: feeding their families. A meaningful job is a bonus.
Yes, I do agree that “Young people in Europe and North America in particular, but increasingly throughout the world, are being psychologically prepared for useless jobs, trained in how to pretend to work, and then by various means shepherded into jobs that almost nobody really believes serve any meaningful purpose.” But what’s the solution?
David Graeber doesn’t elaborate on what the alternative to BS jobs would be. He does suggest Universal Basic Income (UBI) as a possibility. For someone like me, it would admittedly be amazing. I’d never lift a finger for any sort of paid work again. I’d continue writing, of course, but would probably pivot into less commercial-minded projects.
However, while UBI sounds good in theory, it comes with a plethora of problems, not the least of which is that it would be 100% government-issued and -controlled. Thus, almost the whole population would be entirely dependent on the government’s goodwill. If those up above decided to withhold UBI for some transgression (like, say, exceeding the allowed travel limits during a pandemic), who’d stop them?
I was curious about what the author thinks of AI. When I looked it up, I was sad to discover David Graeber had passed away in 2020.
As we near Simchat Torah, the Hebrew anniversary of the October 7th massacre approaches. I usually try to anchor myself in positive things – like kitchen hacks, chickens, and yarn – but right now, I can think of little other than the day two years ago, when our world got turned upside down.
I remember it perfectly. I was sitting and schmoozing with some other moms at the playground. It was Saturday, Simchat Torah, and as Shabbat observers, we were blissfully unaware that anything was going on.
Then a panicked-looking lady ran past us, swinging her phone, and snapped at us, “What are you doing sitting here? (Would it help if we started running?) Don’t you know there had been an attack?” (How would we know?)
I would be away from my phone until the evening of that day, but as we walked home, I caught snatches of buzzing conversations: “army taken by surprise… 300 people killed… how is this possible?”
Hours later, the full extent of the horrifying pogrom became known to us. A horde of bloodthirsty barbarians had invaded from Gaza and proceeded to slaughter around 1,200 innocent people (we’d learn this number later, as bodies were gradually uncovered and identified). As if we didn’t have borders, intelligence units, and a tech-whiz army. As if we were back in the shtetl, at the mercy of invading Cossacks.
The IDF rallied within a few hours, but any illusion of personal safety had been snatched away. We were afraid to leave the house. My children were speculating on whether a terrorist would think to search the attic if we lived through a similar invasion in our town.
I would get up in the middle of the night to check the door and windows. I’d experience a moment of relief once I ensured that everything was locked, only to figure that a hand grenade would probably enable a terrorist to break in.
This was nothing new, of course. We were, and are, part of a nation that had long carried generational trauma of countless expulsions, pogroms, persecutions, and, of course, the Holocaust. But October 7th drew a clear line in the sand: life before, life after. Things would never be the same.
In the months following the massacre, my mental health suffered. I continued working and carrying on my daily routine, but it was mostly on autopilot. I would forget simple stuff. I’d open the refrigerator and struggle to remember why. Things I enjoyed seemed to lose their flavor. I’d want to have my children within my sight, always, which of course wasn’t possible.
The recommendation of mental health services seemed disingenuous. No amount of counseling could obliterate a REAL danger. I began feverishly exploring different possibilities of getting our family out – to some remote corner in the world where we could hide and be safe. Until the rising tide of worldwide antisemitism convinced me that there probably is no such a corner anywhere anymore.
Today, two years after the massacre, and with the elimination of Mohammed Deif, Ismail Haniyeh, Yahya Sinwar, Hassan Nasrallah, and the Iranian nuclear facilities, I have achieved some measure of balance. Life will still never be the same, but I strive to be a worthy link in the chain of Jewish resilience through the ages.
May we get to celebrate a joyful Simchat Torah despite the black cloud of trauma that has now settled over this holiday for all of future Jewish history.
With Rosh HaShana coming up next week, I thought this was the perfect time to make and freeze Tehilla’s birthday cake. However, after popping into three local supermarkets, I discovered, to my dismay, that there’s a shortage of heavy whipping cream, which I needed to make the filling and ganache.
I had several alternative options: commercial plant-based alternatives (yuck!), coconut cream (I prefer it in fruity desserts, not chocolate-based cakes), or, which I was skeptical about at first, sour cream.
Whipped sour cream filling is a Soviet classic that goes great with chocolate cakes. But can you whip sour cream? Yes, if it’s fatty enough. I used sour cream with 27% fat. You can also strain sour cream to make it fattier – just place it in a cheesecloth-lined sieve above a bowl and let it drip for a while.
Whipped sour cream doesn’t turn out as lusciously fluffy as whipping cream, but the results are still delicious. The cream is a bit tangy, so you may potentially need to use more sugar. Powdered sugar is a must here, as granulated sugar won’t dissolve properly. I make my own powdered sugar by running granulated sugar through an electric spice grinder.
Whip well-chilled sour cream until it forms peaks. Gradually add the powdered sugar. Optional: add a tablespoon of instant vanilla pudding mix for more stable cream.
Sour cream also make smooth, silky ganache. Heat chocolate and sour cream at a 1:1 ratio over a very low flame on the stove. Mix constantly until the chocolate has melted. Chill until it’s the right consistency for frosting. Enjoy!
For many years, I was a crochet-only gal. I will always love crochet and consider it the more versatile of fiber arts, suitable for anything from amigurumi and sturdy baskets to delicate garments. However, these days, I’m also branching into knitting. This twisted headband, knitted entirely in stockinette, isn’t perfect – but it’s soft, stretchy, very wearable, and I’m super proud of it.
I worked with leftovers of Malabrigo Silky Merino, a dreamy yarn that’s such a delight to handle and knit (and crochet too, of course!). The technique is super simple: just make a rectangle of the desired length, then fold and sew it together using the method in the Easy Crochet Velvet Twist Headband video. That’s it!
Now, on to the next project… possibly something bigger that requires a gauge swatch.
Our mango tree yielded a surprisingly large crop this summer (photo not mine, as I didn’t snap a picture of the mangoes before processing them), and there’s only so much mango you can eat. So, I sliced and froze a batch, and on one hot afternoon, I decided to experiment and make mango ice cream.
The result was an absolute hit: refreshing, creamy, and quick to make. It contains only three ingredients and is all-natural and vegan!
You’ll need:
About 2 cups of mango slices/cubes, peeled, either fresh or frozen
1 cup of coconut cream
Your preferred sweetener to taste (I used brown sugar)
Blend all ingredients together until thoroughly mixed and smooth. You may need to wait for your mango to thaw if you’re using frozen fruit. Pour into a container, pop into the freezer, and stir about every 30-60 minutes to keep ice crystals from forming.
Scoop and enjoy! If the ice cream is too solid, let it thaw a bit.
I haven’t tried this yet, but I imagine it will also work great with berries, bananas, peaches, passionfruit, or a combo of the above.
As a treat to myself, I decided to do another quick project in one of Malabrigo’s lovely yarns: this time Dos Tierras, which I handled for the first time. It’s superwash, 4 ply yarn made of 50% merino and 50% baby alpaca. I used a 3.5 mm hook; the colorway I chose was Whale’s Road.
Dos Tierras feels and works up a lot like Rios, despite being 50% alpaca (rather than pure merino like Rios). Also, despite being DK/sport weight, it contains the same yardage (210 per hank) as the worsted-weight Rios. This means that Dos Tierras is heavier, more compact, and likely more tightly plied than Rios.
Dos Tierras comes with all the perks of other Malabrigo superwash yarns. It has a lovely hand, a nice stitch definition, and amazing color saturation. It’s even, not prone to tangling, and easy to unravel if necessary.
On the other hand, again, like Rios, Dos Tierras is a bit floppy due to its superwash treatment. In fact, it’s probably even floppier because of the alpaca content, given that alpaca is less elastic and stretchy than merino.
That’s why a hat likely wasn’t the ideal project for this yarn – something drapey, like a scarf or cowl, would work up better. But my daughter really wanted a hat from this yarn, so I tried my best to make it work.
After completing the stretchy brim (single crochet in back loop), I tried doing post cables. Predictably, this didn’t work out too well – the fabric was stiff and heavy, and the cables lay flat, so I unraveled it and did the wheat stalks pattern instead. I LOVE this pattern, but again, I felt it would turn out nicer and squishier with a non-superwash yarn, possibly some lovely single-ply like Malabrigo Worsted.
Domestic Felicity 